Beauty, Fragrance, Health, Makeup, Serums, Skin

Hooray for Boobies!

I have them. I love them. I’m terrified of having babies because I love them so much. I don’t know what I would do if they were taken away by cancer. Yes, I’m vain. Deal with it.

October is the national Breast Cancer Awareness Month and this is a post about some really awesome beauty products you should buy to stay pretty, but also help with the research quest in the elimination of the pesky little shit that invades chests and makes people sick.

There are lots of them I recommend. You know I wouldn’t share anything I wouldn’t personally slather myself with …

MITOQ Bottle & Box

MitoQ is part of my nightly ritual. This stuff is science: “the only topical cream proven to deliver ingredients deep down to mitochondria at levels shown to have an immense effect in rejuvenating the cells, encouraging the natural production of collagen and elastin and leaving skin looking radiant with a lit-from-within glow.” If you buy MitoQ any time this month, they will donate 15% of net proceeds to one of the leading national education and support organizations, the National Breast Cancer Foundation (NBCF).

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DECLÉOR Aromatherapy Coffrets  are a spectacularly amazing day serum and night  balm set in an eco-friendly bamboo case. There are 5 different skin types to choose from and for the 7th year in a row DECLÉOR will donate proceeds to Cancer and Careers, a program of CEW Foundation. 

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PUR Attitude offers beauty products with zero chemicals that could lead to cancer to begin with, so they are offering 50% of net sales for the brand’s 3-Piece Skin Essentials Kit [moisturizer, face wash and eye cream] and the Fountain of Youth [anti-aging serum] to the National Breast Cancer Foundation (NBCF) during the month of October.

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Bright Future Eye Shadow Compact by Jane Iredale is an adorable mirrored compact featuring five eye shadow shades and a travel-sized eye shadow brush, adorned with a rose-colored Swarovski® Crystal. One hundred percent of profits (not just proceeds!) will be donated to LBBC all year round. These colours are practically universal and would be a great gift for the holidays as well.

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FragranceNet.com will donate 15 percent of the proceeds to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation  if you buy anything from the “pink boutique”. These are some of the sample fragrances though you can find other beauty products on the site like hairspray, sea salts, massage oils, shower gels, etc.

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Film to keep an eye out for: BEAUTY AND THE BREAST gives viewers a behind the scenes look at nine female survivors coping with the harsh realities of breast cancer as they aim to demystify the disease and blossom in the face of adversity. Get ready to cry and rejoice.

Hooray for boobies.

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Body, Grooming, Health, Hygiene, Moi

Vagina doesn’t REALLY rhyme with anything.

Nobody likes a stinky pink.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve vomited in my mouth from clients who sit in my makeup chair, legs spread eagle, radiating musty-basement-full-of-dead-fish from their tacos. Sweet Geezeus.

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For the love of breathing to stay alive, please take care of your lady bits!

When I was a kid [and only a few inches shorter] we lived in Kiev, Ukraine and I predominantly stayed at my grandparents’ house. They had a room with a toilet next to a room with a sink and tub. Communism, baby!

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Mum and I back in Kiev right before we fucked off across the pond. This is a clean-vagina face.

In that little room with a toilet my mum and grandmother taught me hygiene. To an extreme.

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Babushka and I circa twenty years ago.

We had this frosted white plastic cup that I was taught to fill with warm water [in the bathing room next door] prior to peeing to be used post peeing, like a ghetto bidet. This was the cornerstone of my many psychoses OCD moments.

Without getting into the evolution of my hygienic practices, you better believe I keep my vagina clean and pretty. Needless to say I always carry baby wipes in my purse.

I’ve recently discovered SebaMed Feminine Intimate Wash that is an organic gel and mimics your body’s natural pH. This stuff smells delicious and the soap-free formula won’t strip you of the gooey good stuff. Squeeze a drop or two onto a washcloth, massage your bikini part and wash away. Voila! Happy pussy.

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They also make products for hair, face and body!

Then, there’s this other new sexy company that makes sexy products without any fake additives. Good Clean Love has a lube that is aloe vera based, 100% natural/organic, edible, safe for knocked up ladies, and simulates natural lubrication like a champ. Ding! Sexy time.

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Also comes in flavours like lavender and cinnamon vanilla. Can you say yum?

And then I have this friend called Hana Lash. Hana is not only a hottie-boombalattie and talented musician/performer, but has recently launched an Etsy shop with the most original vagina cards you ever did see. There’s one for every occasion and they are fucking brilliant. Please buy me some [please include the Bundle Up necklace too]!

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Current status of my vagina: undergoing laser treatment at the Hot Spot Laser Center in Pasadena. Best husband in the world got me the wedding gift that keeps on giving – 6 sessions of Brazilian baldness. Cue angels singing. This place is awesome and ran by two adorable sisters, Marine and Narine, who don’t have a website [gasp] and don’t advertise [double gasp] but kick serious ass when it comes to ridding of unwanted sprouts. It says something about a business when you’re overbooked just by results and word of mouth.

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Stay classy, ladies and wash that snatch! Singeing nose hairs has never been in.

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Body, Health, Hygiene, Moi, Skin, Sunscreen

Backpacking is romantic until everything hurts.

My husband loves climbing shit camping. He’s hiked and camped his entire life.

I have not.

I prefer doing my nails. In a city. In civilization. Preferably sitting down.

But don’t get me wrong – I do love an adventure and Josh and I have already camped twice! Well, three times now.

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Specimen #1: Somewhere by Carmel.

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Specimen #2: Somewhere in Big Bear.

And adventures = fun. And camping = drive to location, walk 12ft, pitch tent, start fire. Backpacking means something completely different.

We drove thirty minutes out of town, parked our car and started walking. Mostly downhill at first. Then a little incline. Passing through what should be little streams but are now just rocks awaiting spring rainfall. We held hands and laughed; strolling deeper up the mountain and listening to the sound of nature all around. It was treacherous and my backpack was heavy [food, clothes, 0° sleeping bag, some butt wipes and my husband’s heavy as hell camera; believe me – he had it worse].

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We found this tree. Behind us is a rock this giant tree grows around.

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Tree bitch.

Then we got to the camp site and we shoveled things into our faces. And I doused myself in a Deet cocktail and took a nap on a picnic bench with the sun shining on mah face. And it was glorious.

But nothing is this simple.

We had to go further up to reach a scenic point on top of the fucking mountain. But now the terrain became even worse: switchbacks, unsteady dusty dirt slides, steep inclines. F. M. L.

Josh and I were in a car accident a few years back where the bone in the T went inches away from me and my back has been a nightmare ever since. Carrying shit in a backpack bigger than me made the nightmare a reality once more. By the time we got to our gorgeous campsite I was whining and throwing all my toys out of the pram. But it was gorgeous. And quiet.

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My shitty phone cam panorama.

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Sunset!

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Husband takes amazing pictures. This was our home for the night.

Morning came too quickly and it was time to down my coffee, pack up and hike a different way down than the one we came.

And by down I mean scaling a fucking mountain.

Here are the details I remember:

  • sending evil glares in Josh’s direction
  • telling Josh he’s a horrible human being for torturing me like this
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • having my arms and legs mutilated by sharp leaves [scroll down for photographic proof]
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • twisted ankles and the nail beds on my toes bruised from the incline down

So, a walk in the park.

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These are my legs post branch lashings. Pictures don’t do this justice.

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Quarter of the way down. Stunning scenery. I love that man. I hate all of those bushes.

When we finally made it down I was pigeon-toed and covered in baked on sweat-dust. Sexual. I know.

But enough about me. Let’s get to product…

Murad Balm

Murad Essential-C Sun Balm for quick application on the nose and forehead [don’t forget the tops of hands].

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Whish Deodorant Swipes were perfect for refreshing [contains hair inhibitors – not too shabby] .

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Kiehl’s Lip Balm with SPF 15 because your lips need balm to be bomb.

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Shea Moisture Joint & Muscle Relief Dead Sea Salt Soak with Lavender & Wild Orchard – you better believe I was soaking [and emailing from my phone because it never ends].

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My Frida Kahlo impersonation.

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This was on my face while I was naked and covered in water. I get these at the Asian market downtown.

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Love of my life [sorry Josh] Osea Malibu Undaria Alage Oil to soothe and repair the skin.

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Ioma Soothing Gel For Legs – this stuff has been a life saver. As a makeup artist and professional backpacker.

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Nip + Fab Post Workout Fix is a topical muscle cooling gel made especially for my tired shoulders and buns.

And now I must go do my nails because they look like I’ve been climbing rocks. Wait. I can actually say that now!

Owie! Owie! Owie!

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Body, Food, Health

Cleanse you CAN.

It’s been a while, girls and boys. And now that the fall issue of Bisous has launched and I am *wed we can be friends again.

Before hopping back into everything that is beautiful, I want to start from the inside out!

Now, I’ve done all kinds of cleanses in the past. Everything from fasting, which I’ll never do again unless I medically need to, to powder form, to you name it. All of them were tolerable. All of them did something towards the end that was positive in some way. All of them appreciated.

And life was good. Until life became superb…

Behold, the CAN CAN CLEANSE!

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Never ever EVER have I dreamed of a cleanse being delicious. Nutritious? Yes. Delicious? Never.

Here is how the story went:

On Wednesday I happen to see a Tweet from the beautiful Kat Odell [Editor at Eater LA and star of Eat, Drink, Love on Bravo].

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On Thursday I arrange a drop off for the following day.

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At 8:30AM on a Friday an adorable Teresa, the creator, came to my door with a smile on her face and a bag full of gorgeous glass jars filled with magic. The very next day I gave these fancy jars a whirl.

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1-day Power Cleanse Schedule

I did a one day Power cleanse, though the options range from 1 to 3 to 5 days. As you can see each jar contains juices, milks, a soup and a tea (you can divide into two cups). Even more amazing – they’re seasonal! Each one was better than the other, I never felt hungry once and looked forward to discovering new flavors as the day went on. Did I mention I had tons of energy?

Woke up and did the crunchy chia juice, had the nut milk [o my god the flavours] in the car on my way to a shoot, a yummy green juice at the shoot, left the to-die-for soup in the car to warm up by the time I was done with the shoot, came home to a refreshing watermelon juice, walked around the neighborhood with all of my excess energy then came home and pounded another green juice, caught up on some friend time with the vanilla nut milk in hand and rested with two delicious cups of warm tea whilst reading the upcoming Palahniuk novel. For. The. Win.

Shame I only did the one day.

Whether you’re a cleanse aficionado or virgin, you should want nothing more than to experience this life changing cleanse. I can honestly say I’ll never touch another chalky detox again.

You can find out all you need to know here: http://cancancleanse.com/

P.S. I chose to reuse the beautiful jars…

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Pickled serrano chiles.

*Tune in tomorrow for the juicy details of my wedding/s!
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Beauty, Bisous, Editorial, Grooming, Hair, Health, Makeup, Men, Moi, Skin

BISOUS

After months and months of tears, pain, hunger, begging and love – a new fashion baby is born.

Created by someone I’m honoured to call a friend, Shelli Wright is the brains/beauty/brawn behind this love child and the mother of a new generation of women who are not afraid to say “fuck yes”!

Design Director/Co-Editor: Chris Bredesen
Art Director: Jasmine Hromjak
Beauty Editor: MEEEEE
Fashion Editor: Courtenay Brandt
Web Designer: Nathan Taylor
Motion DP: Josh Gibson

And don’t forget to check out my Bridgitte Bardot makeup tutorial and goes along with one of our French Icons in our Icon Like On editorial spread!

Bisousxxxxxx!

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Health, Hygiene, Makeup

Expiration | D’expiration

Unlike our foods, cosmetics don’t come with expiration dates.

I think it would be stellar to have it imprinted on the side of the actual lipstick, or engraved into the plastic casing of your shadow duo. Or someone just needs to come up with a makeup line called “Expiration” and part of their genius would be to stamp the exact moment of demise on each item. I know, I’m astonishingly brilliant.

So, without further adieu…

Mascara and Liquid Eye Liners: 3 months.

Liquid Face Makeup, Cream Eye Shadow: 3-6 months.

Natural/Mineral Cosmetics: 6 months, the shelf life for these is short due to the lack of preservatives in the product.

Powder Face Makeup, Powder Eye Shadows, Pencil Eye Liners, Lipstick, Lip gloss: 2 years.

Eye and lip pencils: discard when they become dry, crumbly, and hard to apply – otherwise you can prolong their lifespan if you sharpen them regularly.

Tips:

  • Make sure to always keep your makeup in a cool dry place – eye/lip pencils and lipsticks you don’t often use can be refrigerated.
  • Pumping your mascara will dry it out much faster and spread bacteria inside the tube – try swirling the wand instead.
  • If you have a stye in your eye or a cold sore on your lip – immediately discard of products you have used on the are, otherwise you are just spreading the love and perpetuate lack of healing.
  • Don’t share your cosmetics with anyone unless you are fully prepared to disinfect them instantly.

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Food, Health, Remedy

Health | Santé

Despite all things that may go left, life is important. Health is important.

“To keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.” – Buddha

What you put in your body is the way it portrays itself on the outside. There are no amount of creams and serums that will transform your skin, nails and hair into a picturesque beauty unless you also protect yourself from within.

Stuffing fried chicken and burgers into your face every day will, no matter how blessed you are genetically, show in sprouts of blockage on your dermis. Same with soda, artificially flavoured eats, preservatives, etc. These are all things I’m sure you already know from your mother, but you don’t listen because they “taste so good” and you crave them.

This said, I am not opposing to an occasional indulgence. Life is about celebration and comfort. These two are important. Eat your cake, your papas fritas, your bloody filet mignon…in moderation. In moments like this – savour each nibble. Allow yourself to appreciate how hard you work on keeping yourself in tip-top health in order to enjoy the luxury of an occasional “slip”.

“There’s lots of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven’t the time to enjoy it.”  -Josh Billings

Not to sound like a nagging nutritionist, but…

  • Fruit and veggies can be consumed abundantly and always. Raw, they are an excellent source of vitamins, antioxidants and sugars. Best: leafy greens like kale and mangos.
  • A handful of nuts goes a long way (that’s what she said) as a quick snack. Best: walnuts.  And if nuts aren’t your bag – try dried fruit. Best: apricots.
  • Eggs in the morning are a lot better for your cholesterol than steaks…any time of the day.
  • A lot of acne problems surface from the intake of white carbs and sugars. Stick to whole grains and raw sugar, but please stay away from sugar substitutes if you care about your nervous system.
  • Carnivores should stick to lean meats like grilled chicken/turkey and treat themselves rarely to bloody brawn.
  • Fish is great for healthy oils, fats, minerals and vitamins – especially if you are preggers, though keep away from sushi until your pop. Best: salmon.
  • Coffee, in moderation, actually provides minerals such as magnesium and chromium and prevents your chances of diabetes and some cancers.
  • Alcohol, also in moderation, is a safeguard against heart diseases as it thins the blood. Red wine, in particular, is a great source of antioxidants.
  • Water…no more needs to be said. You already know.

To life!

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