Eyes, Grooming, Hair, Lips, Makeup, Moi, Skin

I got Racked.

If you haven’t already been bombarded with this – there is no escape.

Last week I was featured on Racked LA as a “Glam Pro”. This is kind of a big deal and I’d love it if you checked it out. After all – there is no such thing as bad publicity, right?

I’ll make it worth your while with all the product recommends and an exfoliant recipe you can make in your home because you already have the ingredients. Swearsies!

Here’s a little taste…

Screen Shot 2013-10-14 at 9.08.23 AM

The photographer, Elizabeth Daniels, and I had a little too much fun at Naimie’s that day. Now she’s got a whole new beauty regime and I’m super excited about it.

Special thanks to Natalie de Groot for giving me a shirt from her new line, Nat+J, for the shoot.

And, of course, big love to Kat Odell for whoring me. ♥

Advertisements
Standard
Body, Grooming, Health, Hygiene, Moi

Vagina doesn’t REALLY rhyme with anything.

Nobody likes a stinky pink.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve vomited in my mouth from clients who sit in my makeup chair, legs spread eagle, radiating musty-basement-full-of-dead-fish from their tacos. Sweet Geezeus.

flat,550x550,075,f

For the love of breathing to stay alive, please take care of your lady bits!

When I was a kid [and only a few inches shorter] we lived in Kiev, Ukraine and I predominantly stayed at my grandparents’ house. They had a room with a toilet next to a room with a sink and tub. Communism, baby!

piano 91

Mum and I back in Kiev right before we fucked off across the pond. This is a clean-vagina face.

In that little room with a toilet my mum and grandmother taught me hygiene. To an extreme.

gma 50th

Babushka and I circa twenty years ago.

We had this frosted white plastic cup that I was taught to fill with warm water [in the bathing room next door] prior to peeing to be used post peeing, like a ghetto bidet. This was the cornerstone of my many psychoses OCD moments.

Without getting into the evolution of my hygienic practices, you better believe I keep my vagina clean and pretty. Needless to say I always carry baby wipes in my purse.

I’ve recently discovered SebaMed Feminine Intimate Wash that is an organic gel and mimics your body’s natural pH. This stuff smells delicious and the soap-free formula won’t strip you of the gooey good stuff. Squeeze a drop or two onto a washcloth, massage your bikini part and wash away. Voila! Happy pussy.

yhst-62151296605837_2263_877054

They also make products for hair, face and body!

Then, there’s this other new sexy company that makes sexy products without any fake additives. Good Clean Love has a lube that is aloe vera based, 100% natural/organic, edible, safe for knocked up ladies, and simulates natural lubrication like a champ. Ding! Sexy time.

anlube_item_200104

Also comes in flavours like lavender and cinnamon vanilla. Can you say yum?

And then I have this friend called Hana Lash. Hana is not only a hottie-boombalattie and talented musician/performer, but has recently launched an Etsy shop with the most original vagina cards you ever did see. There’s one for every occasion and they are fucking brilliant. Please buy me some [please include the Bundle Up necklace too]!

il_570xN.502063687_mrud

Current status of my vagina: undergoing laser treatment at the Hot Spot Laser Center in Pasadena. Best husband in the world got me the wedding gift that keeps on giving – 6 sessions of Brazilian baldness. Cue angels singing. This place is awesome and ran by two adorable sisters, Marine and Narine, who don’t have a website [gasp] and don’t advertise [double gasp] but kick serious ass when it comes to ridding of unwanted sprouts. It says something about a business when you’re overbooked just by results and word of mouth.

bald pussy

Stay classy, ladies and wash that snatch! Singeing nose hairs has never been in.

Standard
Body, Health, Hygiene, Moi, Skin, Sunscreen

Backpacking is romantic until everything hurts.

My husband loves climbing shit camping. He’s hiked and camped his entire life.

I have not.

I prefer doing my nails. In a city. In civilization. Preferably sitting down.

But don’t get me wrong – I do love an adventure and Josh and I have already camped twice! Well, three times now.

IMG_2177

Specimen #1: Somewhere by Carmel.

Big Bear

Specimen #2: Somewhere in Big Bear.

And adventures = fun. And camping = drive to location, walk 12ft, pitch tent, start fire. Backpacking means something completely different.

We drove thirty minutes out of town, parked our car and started walking. Mostly downhill at first. Then a little incline. Passing through what should be little streams but are now just rocks awaiting spring rainfall. We held hands and laughed; strolling deeper up the mountain and listening to the sound of nature all around. It was treacherous and my backpack was heavy [food, clothes, 0° sleeping bag, some butt wipes and my husband’s heavy as hell camera; believe me – he had it worse].

camp2

We found this tree. Behind us is a rock this giant tree grows around.

tree bitch

Tree bitch.

Then we got to the camp site and we shoveled things into our faces. And I doused myself in a Deet cocktail and took a nap on a picnic bench with the sun shining on mah face. And it was glorious.

But nothing is this simple.

We had to go further up to reach a scenic point on top of the fucking mountain. But now the terrain became even worse: switchbacks, unsteady dusty dirt slides, steep inclines. F. M. L.

Josh and I were in a car accident a few years back where the bone in the T went inches away from me and my back has been a nightmare ever since. Carrying shit in a backpack bigger than me made the nightmare a reality once more. By the time we got to our gorgeous campsite I was whining and throwing all my toys out of the pram. But it was gorgeous. And quiet.

2013-09-23 18.52.06

My shitty phone cam panorama.

camp3

Sunset!

camp1

Husband takes amazing pictures. This was our home for the night.

Morning came too quickly and it was time to down my coffee, pack up and hike a different way down than the one we came.

And by down I mean scaling a fucking mountain.

Here are the details I remember:

  • sending evil glares in Josh’s direction
  • telling Josh he’s a horrible human being for torturing me like this
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • having my arms and legs mutilated by sharp leaves [scroll down for photographic proof]
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • sliding down in my shorts and getting my vagina massaged by sharp rocks
  • twisted ankles and the nail beds on my toes bruised from the incline down

So, a walk in the park.

2013-09-24 12.06.35

These are my legs post branch lashings. Pictures don’t do this justice.

2013-09-24 09.17.52

Quarter of the way down. Stunning scenery. I love that man. I hate all of those bushes.

When we finally made it down I was pigeon-toed and covered in baked on sweat-dust. Sexual. I know.

But enough about me. Let’s get to product…

Murad Balm

Murad Essential-C Sun Balm for quick application on the nose and forehead [don’t forget the tops of hands].

whish_deodorantswipes_image2_900x900

Whish Deodorant Swipes were perfect for refreshing [contains hair inhibitors – not too shabby] .

kiehl-s-lip-balm-spf-15-in-hue-58b

Kiehl’s Lip Balm with SPF 15 because your lips need balm to be bomb.

shea

Shea Moisture Joint & Muscle Relief Dead Sea Salt Soak with Lavender & Wild Orchard – you better believe I was soaking [and emailing from my phone because it never ends].

553651_10201501729597669_1534950794_n

My Frida Kahlo impersonation.

Collagen

This was on my face while I was naked and covered in water. I get these at the Asian market downtown.

Osea

Love of my life [sorry Josh] Osea Malibu Undaria Alage Oil to soothe and repair the skin.

ioma

Ioma Soothing Gel For Legs – this stuff has been a life saver. As a makeup artist and professional backpacker.

large_fef79f1f-38d9-42a6-98b7-06f9f4c6671d

Nip + Fab Post Workout Fix is a topical muscle cooling gel made especially for my tired shoulders and buns.

And now I must go do my nails because they look like I’ve been climbing rocks. Wait. I can actually say that now!

Owie! Owie! Owie!

Standard
Beauty, CC Cream, Eyes, Hair, leonor greyl, Lips, Makeup, Moi

I married the same man twice. Part I.

Without m̶a̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶g̶a̶g̶ boring you with the details, I have been falling in love harder and deeper with the same human for the past four years. Now I get to call him my husband. It’s pretty awesome.

FLASH

Us.

Our first celebration came the day after gay marriage became legal in the state of California, which is the most amazing because now my mothers in law can get married as soon as they move here. [I tried to make it a double wedding.] The ceremony lasted a whopping 41 seconds and instead of your usual you-may-now-kiss-the-bride, our officiator Master Hooker – it really says that on our Marriage Certificate – told us “you may now slap a bitch” which followed by high fives to seal the deal.

holly

Our beautiful friend Holly came from Chicago an made my gorgeous flower crown.

DSC_2235

Photo courtesy of Marc Cartwright.

IMG_4415

High-fivin’.

griffith hill

The best part.

2013-06-27 20.24.40

We are family.

This all went down flash mob style. Anyone who was interested in coming was given a place and a time to show up. Place was a scenic point next to the Griffith Observatory, which happens to be our favourite place in LA. Time was right before sunset. We thought this would be a tiny event of 5 of us, but turned out to be over 20 because for some reason we have friends that like us. And some friends thought this event was important enough for them to fly to. We are some lucky fuckers.

IMG_4470

Zoe and Gasper trekked from Portola Valley and moved to Dublin just a couple of days after. ❤

IMG_20130627_201349

Our loves Julian, Shanna and Jenna road tripped from Tucson.

As soon as everyone was hugged we went to stuff our faces at a delicious, low key, neighborhood haunt where libations were flowing and faces were smiling. This followed by a drunken game of Cards Against Humanity at ours.

But this wouldn’t be a beauty blog without me telling you what I used on my face and hair, right? Right.

Doctor-T-Supergoop-Daily-Correct-CC-Cream

Love how smooth this makes my skin.

5728-2

Kevyn Aucoin creme blush in Tansoleil. This was the key to being a blushing bride.

wonder

NYX Wonder Pencil in Light for the water line – I wanted to be a little more wide eyed

Bobbi-Brown-Perfectly-Defined-Mascara

Bobbi Brown Perfectly Defined Mascara made my lashes long and separated.

60280L

Cle de Peau lip gloss in #2 was perfectly pouty and silky. Love this stuff.

leonor greyl

Leonor Greyl styling cream tamed any flyaways that were trying to peek through in the mild humidity that day.

And now you know.

everyoneStay tuned for Part Deux tomorrow…

Standard
Beauty, Bisous, Editorial, Grooming, Hair, Health, Makeup, Men, Moi, Skin

BISOUS

After months and months of tears, pain, hunger, begging and love – a new fashion baby is born.

Created by someone I’m honoured to call a friend, Shelli Wright is the brains/beauty/brawn behind this love child and the mother of a new generation of women who are not afraid to say “fuck yes”!

Design Director/Co-Editor: Chris Bredesen
Art Director: Jasmine Hromjak
Beauty Editor: MEEEEE
Fashion Editor: Courtenay Brandt
Web Designer: Nathan Taylor
Motion DP: Josh Gibson

And don’t forget to check out my Bridgitte Bardot makeup tutorial and goes along with one of our French Icons in our Icon Like On editorial spread!

Bisousxxxxxx!

Standard
Beauty, Hair, Makeup, Moi, Video

Painting Anna | Peinture Anna

Some months ago I worked on a shoot and here is a radass video in which various of my body parts make a cameo…

Director/Editor: Chris Bredesen
2nd Camera: Josh Gibson
CD/Photographer: Shelli Wright
Hair/Makeup: Moi
Stylist: Courtenay Brandt
Model: Anna Stimson
Music: Sixth Finger “Paint It Black”

Standard
Moi, School

Becoming an Artist | Devenir et Artiste

This morning I received a heartwarming Email from a reader hailing from France. This girl, Jill, had questions about becoming a makeup artist and thus inspired me to formulate an entry for anyone who has ever wanted to know…

My story:

You can read my “About” section for how it all began with grandma’s red lipsticks and mum’s liquid liner. In high school Biology class I started painting my lab partners’ faces. During my second college I befriended photographers, experimented with my makeup styles and did makeovers on my roommates. By the time I began attending my third school I had been hooked on skin care and makeup.

Reaching out to anyone with a camera and access to models I began my journey.

My kit was as big as a lunch box. Yes, a lunch box. I had a plastic one with Power Rangers and a tin one with Lenore on it. No jokes. My makeup was cheap and I could count my brushes on one hand. Quite frankly I shat my pants every time I entered a studio, but none-the-less, I braved my way and picked up skills through working with a limited kit.

Outside of shoots I was going to school full time as a computer animation major and worked full time as a graphic designer. This went on for nearly three years as I had to support myself and my makeup habit as the shoots were never paid.

Through luck I hooked up with a photographer fresh out of school who was trying to make her way into the industry as well. Together we worked on fashion shows and shoots until an agency began to notice our efforts. Needless to say the work paid off and I was signed and repped (after 3 discouraging meetings due to me not having the slightest idea of how to put a book together) and dropped out of my third college for good to pursue my career. I was signed as the youngest artist in the agency.

I had to learn to do hair. I had to learn about blending. I had to learn patience. I had to learn how to work with difficult clients.

I’ve never been to a single class. I’ve never worked behind a counter. I did a 3 month stint at a spa and left because I’m a terrible sales person when I don’t believe in the product.

Four years ago I became a freelance artist which, in Chicago, was close to a nightmare. I traveled with a scout for two years and traveled all over the US, visiting places I would never trek to otherwise. Over a year ago I moved to Los Angeles and am absolutely in love with this city.

I’ve worked with photographers from all over the world. I’ve built two kits, one for makeup and one for hair, that is ever-growing and over-flowing. I’ve worked on fashion and commercial shoots, music videos, shorts and features, documentaries, etc. I update my book constantly.

DO:

  • build a versatile kit – you don’t have to have every colour and every brush imaginable to perform on a professional level from the get-go
  • test with as many photographers as you can, preferably with models that are repped to get your name out there and your book started
  • learn about cleaning and hygiene
  • make tons of mistakes
  • collect images you adore and replicate them
  • use your friends/family as a canvas to perfect your skills
  • move to a city where you can find work outside of weddings and salons
  • sharpen your “clean face” skills, less is always more
  • watch YouTube tutorial videos (like mine)

DON’T:

  • stick rhinestones and feathers everywhere, this is a clear sign of an amateur
  • get discouraged when someone doesn’t like your work, find out why and do better next time
  • be afraid to start over
  • say you can’t do something, figure it out and get it done
  • flake – you’ll burn tons of bridges and dig a hole for yourself

My Two Cents:

Jill is one of the few fortunate ones who will have the honour of going to the MAKE UP FOREVER Academy in Paris. I totally approve. Though there are plenty of great schools and programs out there that will provide their students with a great education and connect them to networks from the get go, from what I have seen I think the best artists are self-taught. Many programs tend to teach their one way of painting face which makes things difficult on a job that allows personal creativity.

REMEMBER:

You can do anything!

 

Then...

...Now

Standard